Kyuiin

System: Playstation (Japanese)

Review

Game Type: 2D Side-View Shooter
Cutesy shooter, decidedly Japanese. 4 weapon types available (no powerups), smart bombs. 2 Player simultaneous available.

Gameplay: 10/100
Ugh. This is the second-worst Playstation shooter I've ever played. (I never got a chance to translate the name of the absolute worst but it was adult-themed.) Demands no skill whatsoever from the player. The vacuum you ride shields you from most enemies and bullets by inhaling them. As an experiment I let go of the directional pad once and went for an entire stage without getting killed. There are no powerups for the weapons, but they don't really need them. The homing laser, for example, takes out most enemies before they get a chance to emerge on the screen. If that isn't bad enough, you're given infinite continues. In 2-player mode you can hardly fail to beat the game on the first try. (And the ending isn't even worth it.)

Graphics: 10/100
Both the cartoon and rendered sections of the intro are of hopelessly bad quality. The backgrounds look kinda nice in some sections but have almost zero parallax. Gratuitous scaling and rotation are used on the enemies so much that it makes even an effects buff like me sick.

Sound: 10/100
Cutesy music with the occasional singer (bleah) is found throughout. (The music isn't swap-friendly but I actually prefer it when it cuts out.) The sound effects range from unremarkable to annoying.

Overall: 10/100
As you may have realized by now I end most of my reviews by mentioning a set of circumstances under which you might want to try a game even though I didn't like it. Sorry, but I can't do that here. Even if you're crazy about shooters, even if you're really into Japanese culture, don't even borrow this game.

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